Pop Goes the Prom

Tonight is the most epic night in the history of nights.

That's right, it's Glee's Prom Night episode. I try not to read spoilers, because I love to be surprised but I do know a few things.

Quinn is going to smack Rachel in her pouty little face.

and

JESSE ST JAMES is going to be back.

I won't even get into how much I love Jonathan Groff, (described by my sister Mary as "The Straightest Gay Man Alive") because this post isn't about how Groff has been playing dreamy broody teen boys for almost a decade now while living happily out of the closet, it's about the best proms in the history of pop culture (of which this will surely be one.)

10. Sunnydale Senior Prom, Buffy The Vampire Slayer

Why it ranks:
Because of the hellhounds that were unleashed, causing panic. Because it began the Anya/Xander relationship. Because Wesley kissed Cordelia and it was awful, but hilarious. Because Angel came, danced with Buffy and gave her the "one normal high school moment" she had been craving. Because the (at this point) adorable Jonathan presented Buffy with the "class protector" superlative. And it was awesome!

How Glee can beat it:
It can't...move on.

9. The Anti-Prom: Dawson's Creek


Why it ranks:
Because it was the height of Dawson's self righteous, "I'm the nice guy so Joey should love me" phase. Because Jack learned what a douche that guy he was dating was. Because it allowed for "Leary's Fresh Fish" to be shoehorned into the plot ONE LAST TIME before season 3 ended. Because Jen took Henry and they were adorable. Because it was the moment when Joey realized she loved Pacey. Because it finally removed the random and useless Nelly from any and all plot lines in the future.

How Glee can beat it:
Burt Hummel, who makes Mitch Leary look like a father who neglects his kid except when he hits him, so John Whitter, makes sure that Kurt can bring Blaine, thus allowing Brittney to bring Santana, or Brittney and Artie get back together.

8. Manny and Paige Showdown: Degrassi: The Next Generation



Why it ranks:
Because Paige and Manny showed up in the same dress and Paige arranged to have her win prom queen only to humiliate her. Because it was the first time Jimmy was back at Degrassi since he was shot. Because JT and Liberty were still a couple. Because I'm pretty sure Emma still had gonorrhea of the throat. Because Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes were there for no explicable reason (except that they were filming a movie at Degrassi.) Because Downtown Sasquatch played.

How Glee can beat it:
Downtown Sasquatch plays. Except that I think if Jonathan Groff and Jake Epstein are on film together it will rip a hole in the space time continuum, also Aubrey Graham is a little busy. But a kick ass surprise celebrity guest star wouldn't go amiss.

7. "You said you couldn't be with someone who didn't believe in you": Pretty in Pink


Why it ranks:
Because it's the only time John Hughes took on the prom, which means it must be the most epic prom of all time. Because after it all, Andie and Blane kiss in the rain by his car. Because Duckie wears a bolo tie.

How Glee can beat it:
Kiss in the rain. Anyone can kiss in the rain.

6. Two proms, one crazier than the last: One Tree Hill



Why it ranks:
Because at one of them, Peyton didn't show because Psycho Derek tied her up in her basement and tortured her with autotuned versions of her own podcasts. Because at the first one, Peyton had painted "whore" on Brooke's dress prompting Brooke to go rescue her from Psycho Derek. Because the second one was in the town that one the "best OTH fans contest." Because at the second one the whole cast dressed up in 70s clothes. Because at the second one Chris Keller was there. Because Haley was pregnant at both proms and no one blinked.

How Glee can beat it:
Terry kidnaps and tortures Emma by throwing dirt on her, and Will saves her. New Directions gets hired to sing at the Dalton prom, thus creating an epic "second prom" scenario for Glee, which I have already discussed is the same show as OTH.

5. "I just wanted her to have the perfect night": Gossip Girl

Why it ranks:
Because Serena and Dan went "as friends" which is always hilarious. Because Nate and Blair broke up amicably, in the first and only case of lower drama making for a better episode in GG history. Because the B storyline was a failed pilot for a spin off about Lily in the 80s. Because Blair was elected prom queen. Because it turned out the whole night was an elaborate manipulation of Chuck's to make sure that Blair had the perfect prom night. (And I cried and cried)

How Glee can beat it:
Rachel does the same for Finn. Or Finn arranged for Jesse to come to bring Rachel so she can have the perfect prom night.

4. "Dad, I'm going to the prom!" "Very funny sweetie!": 10 Things I Hate About You
Why it ranks:
Because Save Ferris and Letters to Cleo performed. Because Bianca punched Joey in the face. Because even though Kat and Patrick get into that fight you know he feels really bad about it. Because Bianca's prom dress is the most epically 90s prom dress ever. (Bright pink satin and her midrift is bared)

How Glee can beat it:
I think they might, because it looks like Quinn is going to punch Rachel in the face. Good for you Glee!

3. Donna Throws up in the bathroom and gets suspended: Beverly Hills 90210

Why it ranks:
Really? I need to lay this one out? OK, um, Because Donna got drunk, threw up in the bathroom, and got suspended. This paved the way for the epic "Donna Martin Graduates!" storyline. And some half assed message about underage drinking.

How Glee can beat it:
Much like Buffy, this one is just too epic and iconic. Nothing Glee does will touch it.

2. "Is that all I am to you Zach? Am I a bet? Am I a F*@#KING bet?": She's All That


Why it ranks:
Because half the student body knew a choreographed dance number. Because rather than bring another girl than the one he loved, Freddie Prinze Jr. brought his little sister (Anna Paquin). Because Paul Walker brings Rachel Leigh Cook to screw with Freddie Prinze Jr. (That is the most 90s sentence ever written.) Because the "cool hot girl" who was no where near as hot as Rachel Leigh Cook wore the second most 90s prom dress ever. Because Usher DJ'd the party.

How Glee can beat it:
Usher.

1. "Is this a party or what? LET'S DANCE!" - Footloose

Why it ranks:



Because of that.

How Glee can beat it:
Finn sings "Footloose." Also maybe Kevin Bacon shows up? I don't know. It's a thought.

So there you have it folks.

Built on Their Shoulders

Glee was fantastic tonight and not just because the two original songs New Directions did at regionals were actually good. Which they were. Also Kurt and Blaine finally got together and had a super long boy on boy kiss which I'm pretty sure included tongue. My friends and I got REALLY excited about it. But let's not forget that Blaine and Kurt didn't get there by themselves. There are a few specific examples of characters that in my opinion paved the way for our two favorite blazered acappella guys:

Jack McFee: Dawson's Creek

In Season 2, after Joey and Dawson's romance totally imploded, she started dating mysterious new guy Jack McFee. About three episodes later, Jack wrote a revealing poem about his feelings and yelled at his dad about how he was gay. He then moved out of his family's house and in with Jen and Grams creating possibly the most functional family unit on that show. (Yeah, I know!)

After he came out Jack could get kind of preachy, and occasionally annoying...but um, well, if you've seen any of Dawson's, you know he wasn't alone there. They all got that way occasionally. But Jack was also a star wide receiver for the Capeside Minute Men, went through a douchey frat guy phase, and eventually settled in to life as a teacher, living with Pacey's older brother Doug, and the couple raised Jen's baby after she died. (CRY FOREVER! One of the best finales ever)

Marco Del Rossi: Degrassi: The Next Generation

Sure, it's a Canadian basic cable import, but Marco's storylines were always the best on Degrassi...with the possible exception of the EPIC Ash/Craig/Manny triangle, or that time Shawn and Peter were street racing, or when Emma got gonorrhea from going down on Jay in that van...anyway, Marco came out in season 2, but just to Ellie who then pretended to be his girlfriend for a while. Then in the season 3 premier Spinner figured it out, and they got into a big fight and Marco got beat up.

Then he dated Paige's brother for a long time, then he was a hustler in one episode. Also that time that Darcy's mean Christian friends tried to take him down and he shoved his cross in their face and talked about going to Mass every Sunday was awesome. And Marco wasn't the only gay teen on Degrassi, there was also Paige and Alex, but they just weren't as ground breaking.

Calvin Owens and Heath: Greek

I've been rewatching Greek, and really, Cal's awesome. A bit insecure when he first gets to CRU, he hooks up with closeted KT bro Heath. Then he dates TA Michael, but he's still got feelings for Heath, who's coming out remains one of my favorite moments on the show. Heath takes a deep breath and says he has something serious to discuss with pledge brothers Cappie, Beaver and Wade, and reveals his sexuality. The trio exhales, relieved, because they thought this conversation was about Beaver's hitting on Heath's 15 year old sister (Heather, who became a mini Rebecca, but that's a completely different story) at a family event. The brother's are supportive.

Additionally, when Cal gets past his initial insecurities, he comes out to best friends Rusty and Ashleigh, and his brothers at Omege Chi are mostly OK with it too, until he starts dating that douchey other gay Omega Chi, who's name I don't remember. But then he got back together with Heath, thank God!

So yes, Blaine and Kurt are exciting, but let's not forget that they didn't get there overnight.

CSD and It's Victims

I've spoken before about my severe case of CSD or Character Separation Disorder. It's a terrible disorder that effects pop culture junkies everywhere. It is the inability to separate actors from the popular characters that they've played over the years, usually this happens with actors who work in franchise films, or who have been on television.

Here are some of the actors who I have the most severe cases of CSD with:

Joshua Jackson: The Mighty Ducks, D2: The Mighty Ducks, D3: The Mighty Ducks, Dawson's Creek, Fringe

For most people suffering from CSD Josh will always be Pacey Whitter, the lovable screw up. But anyone who's worth their pop culture weight, knows that Pacey was just a teenaged sexually active version of Charlie Conway, captain of The Quack Attack. And his current character, Peter, is just Pacey in a lab, and since Pacey was really just Charlie, without the skates and with a hotter girlfriend, it stands to reason that Peter is Charlie, all grown up and in a lab.

The Entire Cast of Entourage

This applies most strongly to Adrian Grenier, Jeremy Piven and Kevin Connolly, but mostly because Jerry Ferrara and Kevin Dillon haven't done much since taking on Turtle and Drama. I can't be the only person who watched The Devil Wears Prada and thought, "Why is Vinnie following Aquaman with this? It doesn't make any sense for his projected career path." Or when I watched He's Just Not That Into You and I felt so bad for poor E when Scarlett Johansson was treating him like crap (the same way his ex Kristen did!) or well, Piven's a totally different story. Watch Keeping Up With The Steins, where he plays Ari but without the potty mouth. Or PCU where he plays Ari running a frat house. Or...well, I think you get the point.

Nathan Fillion: Firefly, Serenity, Castle, Dr. Horrible's Sing-a-long Blog

Let's be honest, Nathan Fillion is one of those actors who has fully embraced CSD. Castle is just a riff of Captain Malcolm Reynolds, just like Captain Hammer is a perversion of him. Castle even took this to the next level.

Matt Czurchy: Gilmore Girls, The Good Wife

Logan Huntzberger was a slimy, scummy pathetic excuse for a man until Rory Gilmore whipped him into shape. Matt's character on The Good Wife, Cary, is a slimy, scummy excuse for a man, with no Rory in sight to whip him into shape. This is a clear case of the writers even embracing it, when in last week's episode Cary stalled a judge on the phone as Alicia finished preparing a last minute brief, in the exact same way that Logan did when Paris self destructed one night at The Yale Daily News and he and Rory had to save the day.

Aubrey Graham aka Drake. Degrassi: The Next Generation, Huge ass Rapper

OK, so the first time my friends had me listen to "Unstoppable" I was impressed. I'm not a huge rap fan, but I like some of it (Eminem, Jay-Z, Biggie and Outcast) Then someone told me that it was Jimmy from Degrassi. I laughed, and said "yeah right!" Except it is. Personally, I like this better.

Because let's face it. Ash is a bitch. She had a right to her anger, because I mean, hell, if my boyfriend got Manny Santos pregnant, I wouldn't be happy either. (Of course if my boyfriend was Craig, I might forgive him.) But still, I'm just saying long before "Unstoppable" he was rapping about far more important things. Like how Ash should make Craig lunch.

Tomorrow I'll write about actors who have miraculously overcome CSD. Check it out

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!

OK, so as if the whole Vanderbeek on OTH thing wasn't enough for Creek addicts to get their fill of the good old days, Fringe just made my (and btw any other Creek Freak's) WEEK.

First and foremost, Josh got a haircut and trimmed the beard and he looks fine, and they're upping the stakes, now there's chemistry between him and Olivia's sister. I know its only season one and they can't hook up yet, but still, even Pacey wouldn't have screwed Bessie, and he did some pretty insensitive things.

That's not the exciting part, this is:


Yes friends, that is Mary Beth Piel. Better known as Grams. Better known as Jen's surprisingly awesome grandmother from DC. Oh yeah. Talk about your awesome reunions.

Shut up, this is exciting.

Reflection

So I know today was Martin Luther King Jr. Day and tomorrow we're swearing in a historical new president and I'm really proud of my generation and my country and that's where my mind should be.

But alas that is not who I am, so as a result today I will, as promised, I will be talking about James Vanderbeek's guest spot on One Tree Hill.

I was looking for a picture of Dawson and Charlie to post, and while I was looking I found this little video.



It's of Chad Michael Murray and Hilarie Burton on the Spring Break episode of Dawson's Creek, back when she was just a little MTV VJ and he was playing a wannabe rockstar who was trying to bang Joey, and evidently Hilarie Burton, he succeeded in both eventually, do kudos to you.

Alright, so Adam Dixon (Dawson, but a huge douche bag) showed up in Tree Hill and got the job directing "An Unkindness of Ravens" which although it is technically a memoir people on the show keep calling it a novel, it's kind of annoying, but I guess just to a book nerd like me.

The top moment for me came though when Lucas told Adam that he "couldn't relate to this world" and Adam cracked a little knowing smile, as if to say "Kid, I can't relate to this world? This was my world first! Remember I made a movie that you starred inright before you boinked my soulmate?"

Next new episode we get to see casting. It should be fun to see who they pick to play the various characters and if Adam and Lucas will ever get their visions in line. Will the film version of "Unkindness" have the Dawson-esque ending of Haley and Lucas (GROSS!) and Brooke and Peyton die? Hmm? Really, I just want to see a rowboat somewhere in these episodes. Anywhere, I don't care, I really don't.

Tomorrow in my speech class I'm giving a speech on the evolution of the Teen Soap...complete with photos. I'm not using OTH as an example, mostly because it didn't do anything new for the genre. I'll let everyone know how that goes.

Oh right and that little innaugaration thingy...yeah, that.

Who ends up with who...

Soo, last night was it and I just watched it on Surfthechannel...

James Vanderbeek on One Tree Hill. I've watched most of the episodes now...sigh, my friend Ali was right, I'm hooked in. Gloat if you must Allison.

Anyway, he was brought in as a film director named Dixon (That's pretty close to a certain other name if you ask me!) because Lucas is interviewing him to see if he'll direct the movie version of Lucas's novel. First of all we've seen CMM and The Beek square off before. I don't know how many of those watching OTH at this point know that Chad played cheating rocker with a heart of gold Charlie on Dawson's Creek. Charlie starred in one of Dawson's epic love stories, much to Jen's chagrin, and Pacey's irritation (Audrey was playing the leading lady and Charlie was in hot pursuit of Joey at the time...you can see why Pacey'd be pissed about the choice.)

I was hoping, at least a little that this director would be a Dawson reincarnate, someone to match up with Lucas's good guy instincts and they could be sanctimonious together. But I was pleasantly surprised to see they did it differently. Dixon is like the counterparts Dawson finds in the later seasons. Oliver and that British guy. He's abrasive and pushy and hyperactive. It makes sense, because if you were to actually put Dawson and Lucas in a room together to work on a project it would be the most boring, drawn out and preachy piece of trash ever. So instead Dixon insists on two things, the couple you expect to end up together shouldn't, and you have to raise the stakes by killing off one of the younger characters. You have to have a knowledge of Dawson's to really understand the humor behind him asking for those things, one of which he phrases, "The one thing I know is that the audiences goes crazy over who ends up together in the end." Anyone with a remotely intimate knowledge of Dawson's Creek gets the humor in Dixon's requests.

1. The raise the stakes thing by randomly killing off one of the leads. Her name was Jen Lindley. Her story was overall the most interesting and least annoying of any of the characters on previously mentioned show. And what do they do? Halfway through the series finale Jen dies of a heart condition that until said series finale no one, including her best friend in the world Jack knew she had. Raises the stakes? Little bit. Breaks the audience's heart? TOTALLY!

2. The unexpected couple ends up together. OK, so Joey choosing Pacey isn't totally unexpected, and the emotional payoff is worth it. But it's definitely a twist. Dixon is specifically asking for Lucas to end up with Hayley in the movie. That's Dawson talking, Dawson who never got his Joey, wants the best friends to end up together. In all of Dawson's retellings of the story that's how it ends up. Sam chooses Colby, in that movie they make in Season 2 or 3, I can't remember, where Rachel Leigh Cook plays Joey, she ends up with the Dawson character. He wants to see it happen again, even from the guise of this guy who isn't Dawson.

Of course after this we've learned that something's going on with Peyton...my guess is she's pregnant or has cancer.

Or maybe she has a mysterious heart condition that she didn't tell anybody about.

Either way this is going to be a funn ride...Good to have you back Leery.